Adam and Eve

Genesis 1-3: Where we came from

In the beginning, God created a bunch of stuff – well, everything really – in six days, and marveled at his handiwork. On the seventh day, God took a rest from all his hard work, and declared the seventh day of any given week a ‘sanctified’ day. The following day (probably a Sunday or a Monday), he created the Garden of Eden and piled up a bunch of dust, and turned that into a man.

God put the man in Eden to tend to the garden, and instructed him that he could eat from whatever tree he wanted, except for the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, because doing so would kill him. God also took it upon himself to remove one of the man’s ribs while he slept and turned that into a female being. The man (whose name, by the way, was apparently Adam) cleverly called this being “woman” (wo- presumably being the prefix meaning “from the rib of”).

There was also a talking snake that God had placed in the Garden. It told the woman that the tree she was specifically told not to touch for its poisonous fruits was actually not all that harmful. Taking word of God’s talking snake over that of God himself, she and Adam ate the fruit. Suddenly embarrassed at their nudity (while, presumably, at the same time also realizing that God had lied to them), they sewed fig leaves together to cover their privates and hid in the bushes. God asked Adam if he had eaten from the Tree, and Adam promptly shifted the blame to the woman. The woman then confessed to being tricked by God’s talking snake.

Furious, God cursed the snake and damned the woman to suffer pain in childbirth and to be forever subservient to her husband. God cursed Adam to have trouble in agricultural endeavours. At this point, Adam named his wife Eve, and handing them some coats, God kicked them out of the Garden and sent them to be farmers.

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